Fear and anxiety about the current COVID-19 pandemic and what could happen is really overwhelming and causes strong emotions with all of us. Worry about our own health and the health of our loved ones, together with necessary public health actions, such as social distancing, make a lot of people feel isolated and lonely, and make all sort of changes in our daily life.
For me, most prominent thing was having real difficulty sleeping and concentrating. I am very lucky that I could switch to doing my day job from home, so financially I was fine for the moment, but I could not help but worry about how long that would be possible. At first I thought that the new circumstances and working from home exhaust me so much that I could not concentrate on anything else, like reading a book, or watching a film, or creating something - basically all the things that used to make me happier. After a while I realized that the only thing I did in my free time is staring at the ceiling or obsessively reading news. I had a complete creative block. I felt like a slacker, like I could not complete any task that is not immediately necessary to be completed and, since my Etsy shop was doing really awful, I had no motivation to make anything new, or even finish some stuff I started working on and was really excited about them at first. Since there was a complete lock down and nothing to do away from home, I felt really crappy about not having or achieving any of my previously set goals.
At one moment I came across this great video from TedEd, explaining what chronic stress I was experiencing was actually doing to my brain:
It made me realize that I have to start introducing some changes to my daily life in hope that slowly my rapidly deteriorating mental status would get better. I set one simple goal: to manage my time better in order to start doing things that make me happy again.
First thing was taking a break from reading, watching and listening to news stories all the time. I was already informed enough on what to do if I experience any of the symptoms of the disease, I was taking all the measures necessary to avoid being infected and all of my loved ones were informed and taking as many precautions as they could, so there was nothing more I could do.
At some point I started drinking insane amounts of coffee in hope it would "make me" do something productive, so I gave caffeine a break, switched to herbal tea for a week in hope to jump start my brain in order for it to start reacting to stimulants normally. I started exercising a bit (literally a bit, like 5 minutes a day) and taking little pauses to breathe when I feel overwhelmed.
I created a list of daily priorities: eat, finish the job for the day, eat, rest, clean around the house and start slowly sorting things out in my creative life.
I gave myself credit where it's due. I became aware of my limitations, so I had more clues as to what direction to head in: before I attempt to strive for anything, I am confronted with a reality check - can I really accomplish that in the near future, or do I have a bunch of tiny steps in between? Do I really even want this?
I realized that when everything else crumbles around me, I'll get strength from my ability to ground myself in a crazy world that can self destruct from the smallest spark and I cannot do anything else about it.
After a week I started noticing how every next day differed ever so slightly from the previous.
Slowly over a few weeks I was managing my time better and started having all sort of creative ideas. It does sound really simple and logical, but so many people talk themselves out of it - whatever you crave, use it to get moving. When you feel like you have no motivation, think about the goal, not about why you started, because you are probably in a completely different situation now. Think about what you are doing and that you are doing it for yourself. And then simply do it. It will be easier some days and harder the others, but never lose sight of what you want.
Stop wasting time doing things that don't make you happy, only less bored.
Motivation comes from within. I can tell you what to do, but I cannot want it for you. Like anything else in your life, once you train your motivation it will be much easier for you to find it again on days when you really feel empty.
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